Friday, June 3, 2011

still working on that popcorn ....

wrapping up the week with minimal knitting done ... in fact .... once i sat done after all the cleaning and organizing i'm a bit intimidated by all the structure and order and don't want to mess it up ... so i'm just sitting and grinning upstairs like a woman who's soon to be carried off to her own "special space" complete with padded walls .....  but if you think about it ... i just padded one with all SORTS of beautiful colors, so maybe i'm halfway there!  or, they'll just leave me alone to sit.  ..... and work on this popcorn kernel i've still got lodged in my heart ....

several weeks ago i heard a song by Laura Story that she calls "Blessings" and the lyrics have haunted me ever since.  i pray you'll take a moment to listen .... and ponder over the weekend .....

i think these lyrics magnified many of the areas of weakness that i personally fight with and against ... and yet i'm growing with the entire notion that my weaknesses are as much of an identifier as my blondish gray hair, or my piano playing or my big, tired feet.  I've learned that when i wear green my eyes shine ... and when i wear yellow my entire skin tone looks like i need to be living under a jaundice lamplight!  clearly, it's all about who i am .... as much as it is who i am NOT!  and that's a HUGE life lesson in my book!

My fears of getting too close to someone and being hurt - God longs to use me to magnify Himself and what better way than through a scaredy cat who doesn't want to be in front of people.

My fears for my children . . my "motherly" instincts that want to FIX their lives and make things better  - - God PROMISES that His Word will not return void, so my job is to keep pouring His Word into their lives, whether i speak it or live it or pray it over them ... and HE will be glorified as He brings about the plan that He ordained for each of them.

My stubborn (i know, shocker!) and impatient mindset of doing things on my own and not wanting to ask for help ....  I can't really ask God for leadership and help when i won't let go, can i?  but what if i turn my face to Him and open my hands with palms raised high .... such relinquishing is not a sign of weakness but of obedience and ASSURANCE based on His faithful Promises to meet my every need when my heart is turned and tuned to His!

my weaknesses are not sins .... not really even always a bad thing  ..... they are obvious markers of the areas that God can USE where i clearly have NO part in the process .... anything good that comes from them will immediately point back to Him and i will be nothing more than His vessel ... oh wait!  isn't that what He desires .... perspective .... confidence ..... PRIDE in being His Child.

Satan get behind me!  I've been knit together with some very unique "bobbles" in my pattern and design [fears and worries and thighs and feet, bad hair and eyes - pale, un-tannable skin, bad housekeeping skills, average cooking ability, not very strong organizational traits] .... the list is rather extensive ... and thus i will make a PERFECT VESSEL for His Blessings!  I will view things with a "what if" mentality that is always looking for HIM rather than being paranoid that the sky is falling ... unless He opens it up and pours out even MORE blessings on me ... His Mercies in Disguise!

and as i ponder on all the uses that He longs to pour into and through me, i believe i'm going to take a short side trip into the world of crochet for the month of June ....  please plan on joining me ... trying something new ... you don't have to LOVE it ... but it might be a fun little detour into another avenue of crafting ....


mark you calendar for next Saturday .. June 11 .... it's National Knit in Public Day ..... i SO want to do this ..... Hoover Public Library from 2-6 ... or maybe we could meet at the Food Court in the Mall and share the fun!  ponder and pray .. and have a good weekend!  Go buy a crochet hook!

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